The journey of raising children is always a big challenge for parents. Wishing children to become healthy, obedient, independent and intelligent is the goal of every family. To realize this wish, parents need to apply correct, scientific and appropriate parenting methods for each stage of development. Below are 18 parenting methods that have been verified by experts, helping children develop comprehensively in both physical and mental aspects.

Parents think 3- and 4-year-olds need help, but educators believe they're capable of doing a lot on their own.

Parents share tips from preschool teachers in the US on raising children.

1. Expect more

Most people live up to expectations, including young children. “In school, we expect kids to pour their own water, clear their plates at lunch, hang up their coats, and they do,” says Jennifer Zebooker, a teacher at the 92nd Street Y preschool in New York City. “But then they walk out of the classroom, suck their thumbs, and go back to their strollers.” In fact, when parents raise expectations, kids are more likely to meet them.

2. Don't help with things your child can do for themselves

Be patient and let your child handle things that are within their capabilities instead of rushing in and doing them for them just to get things done faster. “Whenever I want a child to put on a coat or sit in a chair at the table, I gently ask, ‘Do you want me to help you, or can you do it yourself?’ Those words are like magic, because children want to do it themselves,” suggests Donna Jones, a teacher at the Schneider Children’s Center at Southern Oregon University.

3. Don't fix things your child has done

If your child makes his own bed, resist the urge to smooth the sheets. If he chooses a combination of stripes and polka dots, praise his unique style. Kathy Buss, principal of Weekday Preschool in Morrisville, Pennsylvania, believes that unless absolutely necessary, don't fix things your child has done. Your child will notice your actions and become discouraged.

4. Let your child solve simple problems

If you see your child trying to assemble a toy or get a book from a shelf that he can reach on a ladder, stop and watch before helping. “As long as they are safe, the moment you don't rush them, give them a little time to figure things out for themselves, that's when character is being formed. You want everything to be perfect, but if you do, you rob them of the opportunity to experience success for themselves,” Zebooker said.

5. Delegate chores

Raising preschoolers is a confusing task for many parents. Illustration: Reality Moms

Putting children in charge of a simple daily task will help build responsibility and confidence, and a sense of self-efficacy. A child who is assigned to water the plants believes that he or she can dress or feed themselves. Just make sure the task is within your control and that it is a real, contributing task like any other family member. Preschoolers will know the difference if you assign meaningless tasks just to keep them busy.

6. Praise

Walk into many preschool schools and you'll see children sitting quietly in circles or rows, raising their hands to speak. The question is, how do teachers get so many children to cooperate? Praise is key. At the same time, you're shaping your child's behavior because they'll repeat what others notice.

7. Develop Predictable Routines

Kids collaborate in school because they know what to expect, says Beth Cohan-Dorfman, education coordinator at Concordia Avondale Campus Preschool in Chicago. “They do the same thing every day, so they quickly learn what to do, and eventually they don't need to be reminded,” says Cohan-Dorfman.

Although it can be difficult to establish a routine at home, the more consistent you are, the easier it is for your child to cooperate. Establish some routines, like getting dressed before breakfast, washing your hands when you come in from outside, etc., and your child will gradually follow the family rules.

8. Encourage

If your child refuses to do something, turn it into a game. “Humor and games are great approaches that many parents sometimes forget,” Zebooker commented. When her son was little, she had her own way of convincing him to put on his shoes in the morning. She would say in a playful voice, “Welcome to Miss Mommy’s Shoe Store, I have the perfect pair for you to try on today.”

9. Warn about changes

When you need to turn off the TV, stop playing to eat, or go to someone's house, give your child a heads up so that he can finish what he's doing. If you need to leave at 8:30, tell him at 8:15 that he has a few more minutes to play, then he has to stop.

10. Offer rewards carefully

If you are not careful, you can easily make your child do things just for the reward, without grasping the true meaning of the work, such as cleaning up toys because the whole family is about to go to the dining room. You should only offer rewards for things that require more effort than everyday tasks like brushing teeth or dressing.

11. Respect the family: teach children to be polite and loving
Respect the family is the foundation to help children develop their personality from an early age. Children need to learn to respect adults, take care of family members and maintain harmonious relationships in the family.

Suggestion: Teach children how to say hello politely, talk to grandparents and parents respectfully and lovingly.

12. Always be gentle when teaching children: soft but firm teaching
Educating children requires patience and gentleness, but also clarity and decisiveness. Children will learn from the way parents handle situations, so be a role model in behavior and be firm when necessary.

Suggestion: When your child makes a mistake, instead of scolding, explain the consequences and work with your child to find a way to correct the mistake.

13. Be consistent in raising children: create trust and stability
Consistency in education helps children easily perceive and comply with rules. Young children are easily confused if parents suddenly change their views or rules. This makes them not know what is right or wrong.

Suggestion: Once a rule has been set, parents need to stick to it and explain it clearly so that children understand the reasons behind each rule. Avoid contradictions between words and actions.

14. Teach children age-appropriate things: accompany their development
Understanding the psychology of each stage of development will help parents easily choose the right education method. Children of each age have different needs and cognitive abilities. If parents set unreasonable expectations, children are prone to pressure or negative reactions.

Suggestion: Learn about the stages of children's psychological development to adjust teaching methods. For example, young children need to learn to self-regulate their emotions, while older children need to develop problem-solving skills.

15. Regular interaction with children: strengthen family bonds
Positive interactions between parents and children not only improve emotions but also promote intellectual and emotional development. Children need care and support from their parents to feel safe and loved. This interaction is also the best way to understand children and detect problems early.

Suggestion: Spend time every day talking, playing, or doing favorite activities with your children. This not only strengthens relationships but also helps parents closely monitor their children's development.

16. Practice reading habits: develop thinking and intelligence
Reading not only helps children expand their knowledge but also nurtures their thinking and imagination. Children are often fascinated by modern technology, but the habit of reading can balance and nourish their souls. Reading also helps children develop vocabulary and language skills.

Tip: Start by reading with your child and choose age-appropriate books. Ask questions related to the content to stimulate your child's ability to reason.

17. Patience is the key to successful parenting
Patience not only helps parents stay calm but also creates a healthy parenting environment. Young children need time to understand and change their behavior. Parents' anger or impatience can damage their self-esteem and sense of security.

Tip: When your child makes a mistake, instead of losing your temper, patiently explain and help your child realize his or her mistake. Remember that positive change takes time and effort.

18. Help your child recognize mistakes and learn from them
Teaching your child how to recognize and correct mistakes is an important skill that helps them grow up. Instead of punishing them, guiding them to recognize mistakes and find ways to correct them will encourage the spirit of learning and develop personal responsibility.

Suggestion: When your child makes a mistake, analyze the causes and consequences with them. Encourage them to come up with solutions and commit to not repeating the mistake.
The key to success in parenting
Raising children properly is a journey that requires patience, understanding and boundless love from parents. The 18 methods above not only help children develop comprehensively but also create a healthy educational environment where children feel loved and respected.

Remember, each child is an independent individual with unique personalities and needs. Flexibly applying methods suitable for your child will be the key to helping parents build a solid foundation for their child's future success and happiness. Parents should be the companion, friend and greatest inspiration in their child's life!